in search of the mighty frog

I knew it was going to happen eventually, I just wasn't really prepared.. A few moments ago I read our first negative review.... I read the three lines over and over again, trying to put it all together. The sad thing is, the review sounded true.

The writer calls himself the mightyfrog, and I long to know who he/she is.. Most of the customers who come in are overwhelmingly supportive; big smiles and lots of praises, but occasionally I wonder just how honest some are especially when I know that something is amiss with the cook that day... Really, I just wish that people would tell us when they don't like their food. The other day, for example, a customer remarked that his food wasn't hot enough. I know now to pay closer attention to the temperature, and am thankful for his help in getting it right. This weekend a customer said that her roots were too dry; no problem, I swept them away and we made new ones, and tossed the whole pot that were of complaint.

I know that not every person is going to tell me exactly what I could do differently to make their meal more enjoyable (and I'm thankful for that), and, at the same time, it is hard to here criticisms second hand. Perhaps one of my biggest fears is finding out about my mistakes while standing in the check-out line at the co-op and overhearing someone talking bad about me or kismet..Or, like this weekend when I overheard a gentleman at a table say he would never come back again!!! Why???I wanted to know right away, and fix whatever was making him unhappy, and yet I had to let it go, he wasn't actually talking to me but to his friend at the table...

I thought if I wrote about this in this blog, I would feel better about the mightyfrog's unhappiness and negative (honest) review. I need for kismet to work. I need to know what our weaknesses are so that we can make it. I guess reading the reviews is one way, but the mightyfrog may never let me make it up to him, and in the meantime how many people will he influence from ever coming in?

well, that's the business I guess

because i love you

As valentine's day approaches, I suddenly feel festive again, and am having to stop myself back from turning everything into cute little presents.. I am tempted to turn the salt pink, cut beets into little heart shapes, stash chocolate in every one's pockets, and sprinkle flowers everywhere... When we opened Kismet, I thought that valentine's day would be our big day- with loads of customers stopping in for our yummy chocolates and fancy truffles, or treating their sweeties to a delicious and nourishing brunch after spending the morning in bed together... But now it seems like I haven't had nearly enough time to prepare.. This last week at kismet has been our busiest yet, and I am, at times, feeling like I am just cruising through the rapids of this whole endeavor. I notice the hour and a half it takes to temper the chocolate, where as just a month ago, it was a welcome meditation had in the silence of the early morning. The stress of doing everything by hand requires a sort of patience and concentration that sometimes means focusing on the quality rather than the quantity. This week, for example, we have about 3 dozen outrageously dense and dark chocolate truffles (meant to be sliced and shared), gluten free chocolate covered yummies and a few of our hard-to-describe salt and pepper chocolate bars. It may not be a full-scale valentine's effort, but this is all in addition to our regular artisan foods and everyday menu featuring our hand-made butters, crepes made with local flour, and brunch and lunch things accompanied by our handmade mustard, ketchup, paprika oil, dressings, fresh pressed juices, and all the other simply perfect creations we offer each day... I still am thinking about making a special rose flavored hot chocolate with pink whip cream and everything... The dandelion latte is perfect the way it is...but wouldn't pink sprinkles on top be cute?

Funny though how holidays (even Valentine's) have so many layers to them.. Whether you are celebrating someone else, or celebrating yourself, remember to believe in all things that are meant to be..Kismet is real...and like a little chocolate at the end of your meal, or a smile when you needed it most, kismet is all yours to enjoy..

Because i love you.

because i love you I will not torture myself to make you chocolate

i will make you chocolate when it feels good and when i am in love with every part of it

because i love you i will sleep well tonight

i will drink a glass of wine and dip cookies in milk and put my feet up

because i love you i will not spend money i do not have out of fear that i am not enough

i will believe in my prosperity by creating you gifts from the center of myself

because i love you, you will know where to find me

i will feed you

feed you full and to the brim with good food and clean water

because i love you i will not act carelessly

i will pay attention

because i love you i will not hide my whimsical pink sprinkles

my heart shaped beets,

my ridiculious heart balloons...

snowy day

Just as winter seems to have truly arrived, I have already begun dreaming about spring and summer. Not that I mind winter, mind you, Vermont Winters are what I've missed most whenever I've lived elsewhere. I love the stillness of the streets when it snows, how the snow outlines every branch and roof line. I even love how it gets dark so early, and how fresh and cold it is outside and how warm it is inside. Hot chocolate tastes better here. Wood smoke smells sweeter. No, I really do love winter, it's just that after nearly 3 months of winter root veges and and meat, I have begun to dream about fresh greens, herbs, berries and wild ramps. I have been making lists of all of the dishes I want to prepare come summer; big fresh salads with assorted lettuces and leaves, new summer goat cheese, berries, and drizzled with maple syrup from the new year; home-made vege burgers with my own aioli, juicy new tomatoes and onions, steamed yellow beets, and crisp butter lettuce; grilled chicken fillets with lots of fresh herbs, sprouts, and micro greens; asparagus crepes; wild leek pancakes and tarts; tender new mushrooms; fresh fruit sorbets; and BERRIES ON EVERYTHING....

Like many other Vermonters, I stare out at the snow and make private internal commitments to spend more time outside this summer, to have a garden, grow more potatoes, plant trees, start herb containers, and find wild food to preserve for next winter. I make lists of the menus I want to offer at kismet, lists of the farms I want to visit, lists of the ingredients I need to source. Even with the snow outside, and beans soaking on the counter, I know that summer will be here soon enough, and sweep me away with it's rapid heat, long hours, and celebrations. I will enjoy these beans, these snowy days, continue my lists, and be thankful for all that I have to keep me warm and inspired throughout this dark season, and still I will allow myself dreams of fresh sage on my lips, lemon thyme crushed between my fingers, and the smell of warm dirt on potatoes...

NOW OPEN!

we're open!

until now, all of the entries on this blog have been written somewhat anonymously..

but now we would like to introduce ourselves!

Alanna (in the photo, on the left) is often seen with her two children, or in the Kismet kitchen folding spanikopita or making dandelion lattes. she lives in plainfield and she is lovely..

I am Crystal (in the photo on the right), and I live here in montpelier. Lately I have been seen running down the streets of montpelier collecting odds and ends, or dropping off urgent messages to city officials. If you have spoken to me on the phone recently, I am the one who is usually very emotional and ends up crying (sorry Ida and Stephanie...)

Alanna and I both bring very different aspects to our little Kismet, and yet we work well together as a team. We both pulled an all-nighter on Friday night to be able to open up our doors Saturday morning. We were pretty tired, but WOW! what a beautiful little restaurant we have!

Until we secure our necessary what-nots from the state (any day now..) we will make the final leap from a take-out restaurant to a full service eat-in establishment with about twenty seats.

Everyone who has come in so far has lovingly admired our space, I wish that Damian (my yummmy guy) could be there to hear all of the praises sent his way (he is the renovator and creator of all of our fabulous concrete tables and bars and windowsills).

Our first two days were pretty mellow,

but successful.

every new endeavor is scary and this one has brought up lots of fears for both of us. Will we succeed? Will people like our food? Can we do it?

The first two days were like a very gently yoga asana... stretching a little bit further each moment, getting comfortable, stretching some more, breathing.... affirming our strength and telling ourselves "that's it...keep going".

On Sunday morning I walked to Kismet at 6 am-still dark and chilly- and in the quietness of montpelier I thought about what I am really scared of... Its hard to verbalize.. Not being good enough I guess.. and then I got to the restaurant, and turned on the lights and just stood there soaking in the real honest beauty of it..

Sure, we've never done this before. But in the process of walking this journey we have learned so much and have met so many great people. Today Margaret at CVCAC was (as usual) particularly inspiring, and reminded me that if I can really visualize what I want than I am can believe it is possible and, in turn, can allow it to happen.

Thank you to all of the people who have helped to make this fantasy come true...

see you for breakfast on Wednesday!

Kismet!

giving thanks

The new space seems to be unfolding, and each day Kismet feels more like a restaurant and less like a construction zone. When will we be open? that's a good question.. We are hoping for the second week in December, so keep your eye out for us.. Last weekend was the last Montpelier farmer's market. It was exciting to see how much local food there is still available and it gave us an opportunity to connect with farmers and to see familiar faces. For the last several months we have been totally and completely absorbed in the renovation process. Everyday we meet and try to tackle the random jobs of this new business. In the face of this huge endeavor we have had to take on jobs we never before attempted. Industrial cleaning, demolition, painting, design, and repair have been our focus while trying to complete the necessary and equally intense tasks of maintaining our business through permitting processes, budgeting requirements, and idealistic goals. While working 12 and 15 hour days, we have also tended our children, and tried to keep our homes in order. There have been so many late night phone conversations, early morning dramas, and emotionally exhausting ordeals, it is hard to explain to our friends, family, or community just how intense this whole process has been. Perhaps the most profound part of this experience, however, is that despite all of the ups and downs, things keep happening that remind us that this is all meant to be. Just when we think things aren't going to work out, something shifts and we are on track again, proof that when we really put ourselves out there with total faith and honest ambition, we are rewarded with truth and humble joy. Every time we get to a place where we really need help, help just appears. We have been honored to have been able to receive help from all directions, and are so thankful for everyone who made themselves available when we were on the verge of breaking down.

Big thanks

Thank you.... maggie, johnny and marianne for your letters of encouragement and support; stefi for being ultimately available, compassionate and empathetic and for helping us with the kids, for painting and cleaning and helping the space glow; emily for making time to clean when we were about to give up; humbert, beck, kate, and theresa for your immediate response to our painting dramas; stephanie smith for your patience and attentiveness concerning our zoning questions; john armstrong for your generous support and engineering expertise; eric at capital copy for stepping in during our little crisis (you know the one); fred for being flexible and professional with your plumbing know-how, kate and lindsay for your photography and for making time when we know how busy you really are; peter next door for your encouragement, enthusiasm and pie, margaret at cvcac for being so abundantly available; jen for trusting in us, coming to new york and helping us stay on track, and all those other things you do to keep a smile on our faces; esme for the many hours you've devoted to give us much needed and appreciated support in painting, venting, and childcare; maggie and michelle, each for finding time to check in and giving us links to the right places; aaron for your patience and legal advice (we'll be in touch soon); daniel for your readiness to help with whatever we toss your way; nutty steph for your spreadsheet support, community capital of vermont for believing in us and lending us the money; kelly and trevor for being great landlords and for being open to our plans while charging us a fair and reasonable rent; kyle for getting those grills clean no matter what; Golga for being so damn generious- the cooking, the shopping, the childcare, the editing, the enthusiasm, the endless support, and the never ending love; Mariann and Terence Pratt for co-signing our loan; Paul and Pam Dorf for your loving support, informative business books and kitchen supplies; Judy Dorf for your love, encouragement, and prosperity blessings;
krista, kristen, raven, steph, esme, trish and aliza for you childcare support, compassionate flexibility and comfortable charity; Kate and the vermont localvores (http://www.vermontlocalvore.org/), who provide information and are creating a network to help people find local food (thanks for listing us on your sight!); our moon circle who really listened and helped to manifest this opportunity, dave thurston for letting us use your space, your insight and your extra materials; our children- Nihyahbinghi, Moses, Avery Dusk, and Fela for your unconditional love, laughter, and acceptance even through all the interrupted parenting time - you boys are truly gifts to us all; and Damian....who kept with it even when he was overworked, overwhelmed, and under compensated (you've done an amazing job).

Thanking you all and and looking forward to celebrating with you soon.

*

Transformation!

Do you recognize this space?

check out www.kismetkitchen.com

thats right, we have a website!

The plan is that this blog will post all of our menu updates, classes, and interesting news., and the website will be our home base with great links and information about us and the montpelier community. Stay tuned to both and keep your eye out for signs of Kismet.

loan application results

3:00 pm, on my knees kneeling before my family alter,

holding jade and repeating my mantra;

"I am birthing myself right now.

held by the loving arms of my family,

I am supported."

I closed my eyes to concentrate on my goal-

prosperity, creativity, health, harmony, satisfaction.

I squeezed my eyes and sent whispers to my inevitable fate-

"I have room for success",

I whispered, and just like that, the phone rang...(actually, BOTH of my phones rang..)

*

At first I was so overwhelmed; all of this time waiting and hoping for a yes or no- something simple and clear, something profoundly obvious, and yet what I got was so different.

"Congratulations", Chris Rotler of Community Capital of Vermont said, but I wasn't sure what I was celebrating.

When Alanna and I began creating Kismet, we were very clear about our lack of resources. Alanna and I both have two children each and very limited incomes. Alanna has been the sole provider for her children, and my partner and I have been students up until this last year. Neither of us have ever applied for a loan, nor do we own anything significant. We have minor savings and neither of us has had a full-time job (besides parenting) for many years. Our families have been supporting us each in a number of ways for some time, so when we looked into financial resources, we decided not to ask too much of our families. This would be our own thing, OUR debt, OUR own risk.

So when Chris said that the committee is going to grant us $42,500 if we can get a co-signer to back 1/2 of it, I was excited (we were approved...well, sort of), then flooded with emotion.

I hung up the phone annoyed and frustrated, and went to tell Damian the "news".

"This is exactly what I didn't want," I told him, "I wanted a yes or no..."

In a fit of spontaneity and deep desire to own a restaurant, I went immediately to the phone and dialed my parents. Something a rarely do, emergency or not.

Unexpectedly dad was home (strange..) answered, and as soon as I told him the "news" he offered to co-sign. "Send me the papers." he said.

whoa..

Deep breath.
An hour passes.

Get the laundry..

Go to the co-op.

Drink Prosecco.

Alanna calls (we agreed for me not to tell anyone until I told her- she was at a catering job), and I tell her the news...

Wow..its all starting to settle in...

we're going to open a restaurant this year..

well in November, actually...

Six weeks..

wow

thanks mom and dad...

(my parents)

(and thank you Community Capital of Vermont!)

in the name of all things meant to be Kismet is born!